When Silence Is Not Golden

Introduction

Happy Valley has been anything but of late. I speak of the campus of Penn State University. And of course, the football team is doing better than people expected this year. But the legend coach, Joe Paterno, who died, I believe it was earlier this year, was embattled, and that forced his resignation prior to his demise. But the controversy swirling around Jerry Sandusky, one of his assistant coaches, has forever tarnished the Joe Paterno coaching legacy. His statue has been taken down. And the problem had nothing to do with what Joe Paterno said, but had everything to do with what he did not say. Perhaps you’ve heard of the famous Chicago White Sox player Shoeless Joe Jackson, who was involved in that scandal, yes, baseball’s first major scandal in the early 1900s, and the young fella who came up to Joe and said, Say it ain’t so, Joe.

And as history goes, Joe said nothing in reply.

Joe said nothing. Edmund Burke is quoted with a familiar statement all that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing. Or in this case, to say nothing. And so for a few moments tonight, I want to talk to you about when silence is not so golden. As sometimes you hear silence is golden, especially when parents have little children running around making a lot of racket and noise, and somebody next door has the stereo up really high, or on the 4th of July around here, when it’s like the demilitarized zone. I mean, it’s like there’s a war going on outside, and we’ll say silence is golden. But we’re going to talk tonight about when silence is not so golden. And the first point is actually a disclaimer to that.

1. Yes, Silence Can Be Golden

Yes, silence can be golden, and that sometimes too many words, careless words, can hurt. And I would take you to some passages in the book of Proverbs, beginning in Proverbs chapter 10 and verse 19, where the wise writer says, When there are many words, transgressable. But he who restrains his lips is wise. Proverbs chapter 17 and verse 27. He who restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding. And Proverbs 21 and verse 23, he who guards his mouth and tongue guards his life and soul from troubles. Ecclesiastes 5 and verse 3 is an interesting text as it speaks of carefully guarding your steps as you go to the house of God, so that you do not offer the sacrifice of fools.

And he says, therefore let your words be few. And he says, through many words is known the voice of a fool. And so here is some wisdom of Scripture in regard to the proliferation of words. One of our presidents, Calvin Coolidge, was known as silent cow. I guess because of the things he refrained from saying. In fact, he once remarked, I have never been hurt by what I have not said. And so sometimes it’s good for a politician to stay quiet, which both of our present presidential candidates have learned as they have said things that they thought would not be repeated to the public and consumed by the public at large, but both have said things that have been issued far and wide in the news media, and then they’re always trying to cover their tracks in regard to these careless statements that they have made.

You know, words can be apologized for.

Like the other actions that we commit, but particularly our words, as much as we might want to take some of the things that we’ve said back and say, oh, act like that never happened. Those words never came out of my mouth. The fact is, once they’re out there, they cannot be returned. And so we have some wisdom in the Proverbs and in Ecclesiastes about being careful in regard to what we say, and that a multitude of words could potentially lead us into trouble. And then there is the Proverbs of the New Testament, as James is often called, as it sets the table in chapter 1 for everything that’s going to follow in the next four chapters. It says in James chapter 1 and verse 26, and I find this to be a very compelling statement in the New Testament.

If anyone thinks himself to be religious, and yet does not bridle his tongue, but deceives his own heart. This man’s religion is worthless. What kind of premium and what kind of value does God place on the words that we choose to speak? If we simply, as the proverbs say, fools spout folly, if we simply just let it go without any kind of restraint, without any kind of control, the first thought that pops into our minds, the first word that crosses our minds, just let it fly, let it rip. If we have that kind of an approach to our words, James says, this person’s religion is vain. And then he goes on to talk about what our words can do negatively, that it’s like a fire that consumes a forest.

And he says that no man can tame the tongue. The tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity, and it defiles the entire body and sets the fire, sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell. And so these warnings are given to us about the potential danger of the things that we say. And of course, Jesus in Matthew chapter 12 talks about the words that we speak come from our hearts. They issue from what’s going on in our mind, in our thinking. And we can know of a tree, good or bad, by its fruits. But he talks about the words that we speak, and that every careless and idle word shall be measured against us in the day of judgment.

The things that we say will be a part of our judgment in the end. By your words, you will be justified or condemned. He concludes in Matthew chapter 12 and in verse 37. I wonder sometimes when I do look at Facebook, which is becoming more and more infrequent. If I miss your posts, I’m sorry. I don’t look at it that often. But sometimes I’ll look at some of the Facebook posts, and it’s like, did you realize you were putting that out there for public consumption? And that all these people, sometimes friends and otherwise, are going to see what you put down here. You may have done this in the privacy of your home or your bedroom or your living room, but once you put it out there, those are your words for everyone to consume and draw judgments about you and what you stand for and who you are.

It’s like, did you give any thought to that at all? I’ll tell you what, I’m even posting something about sports, which I’ll do from time to time to see if my sports fans, friends, will comment and we’ll have some kind of back and forth about that. I’m still careful what I write about that.

You need to be careful what you say that others hear. So that little warning about those words that can be so easily expressed and others can see. Jesus was very careful in his words. There’s some interesting things about Jesus, he knew when it was pointless to speak. He was like a lamb silent before its shearers. Remember that? In Isaiah 53, he opened not his mouth before his accusers. I mean, Jesus had a lot to say during his ministry, but when he was put on trial, he answered not a word. I find that interesting in Matthew chapter 26. Do not answer a fool according to his folly. The wise writer said. Jesus knew when it was time to speak, and he knew when it was time to be silent, and that his words would not change anything in the callous hearts of his accusers.

2. Sometimes Silence Can Hurt

So I use all of those points to make this a very important point about our words that we need not be careless, and that too many words can be harmful. But when silence is not so golden, sometimes silence can hurt. Sometimes a situation calls for speech and not for silence. Silence can hurt you. And sometimes hurt other people. And that’s what happened in the Penn State controversy revolving around Gary Sandusky. Actually, it’s Jerry, but it’s spelled with a G. I get confused. Gary Sandusky’s the faithful gospel preacher in Madison, Indiana. Don’t confuse him with Jerry Sandusky, who will probably get life in prison, whatever amount of his life is left. But because they kept silent, oh, if we if we let this get out, then the university might be at risk.

Lawsuits and such. Well, what about now? You think there’s some lawsuits now? Oh, but if we say something, there might be lawsuits, there might be a scandal. Let’s keep this all quiet. We’ll probably tell Jerry in private, you can’t let that go on anymore. And reprimanded him, no doubt. But at the risk of what? Now look what’s happened because they kept silent. And not just in regard to the backlash to the university and its beloved football program, but look at what happened to all of those innocent young men who were affected by this person’s position, which he abused at the university. So for all of Joe Paterno’s incredible achievements as a football coach, for all of the W’s that he put into the wind column decade after decade after decade, it all becomes tarnished because of what he did not say.

Because he refused to speak when it was time to look at this with me. This is an interesting story. I don’t know what to make of Eli the priest and the judge. Samuel is sometimes regarded among the judges, though not found in the book of Judges. He is regarded as the last judge. Well, Eli was also called a judge, and he was a prophet. So I guess if we’re going to include Samuel in the list, we might want to include Eli in the list. I don’t know how you regard the list of judges, but he was a judge and a prophet. And remember when Samuel was born, that special birth to Elkanah and Hannah, he was devoted to the Lord, which meant he would go to be with Eli.

And he would be his teacher, and he would be the pupil. And that’s when the occasion happens in 1 Samuel chapter 3, where Samuel hears the voice of the Lord and doesn’t know what it is. And he runs into Eli and says, Master, did you call me? And then Eli figures it out. This is the voice of the Lord. And so when that happens, Samuel, you say, speak, Lord, for your servant is listening. I’d say Eli was a man of faith. Eli was Eli was not a bad man. But the thing Samuel heard that night was about the house of Eli. That God was going to judge the house of Eli while he lay in the same house. And I like this about Samuel that says in the King James Version, he held back not one whit of what God told him.

He held not back a word. The reason why I like the King James Version so much there, amazing call out for the King James Version, yes, is that when I was a young boy, I heard Robert Jackson preach a sermon about Samuel, and I remember him saying, He held not back one whit over and over again. After every point he made, he said, I like that manuel. That’s a great story. But what did God have against the house of Eli? It was his worthless and wicked sons, whom he did not restrain. That was God’s judgment upon Eli. In 1 Samuel 2. But even though it says earlier in 1 Samuel 2 and verse 22, that though he was old, he heard all that his sons were doing to wall Israel, and how they lay with the women who served at the doorway of the Ten of Meeting.

They were doing some bad things. And he said to them, Why do you do such things? The evil things that I hear from all the people.

And so he tells them, you’re all misbehaving. But still God says, You didn’t do enough to restrain them. Now, I don’t think that means by restraint that he should have put them in chains. I mean, that might have prevented some of the more egregious act that they committed. Let’s put them in jail. Let’s put them in chains. But there was more that he should have done as a parental figure in discouraging this behavior in his sons. Or he should have acted earlier, because here he does it when he is very old. They’ve been at this for a while. And fairly extensively, since the reports are circulating among the people. There is a time to speak, and there is a time to be silent, and this is a time for Eli to have spoken.

3. We Cannot Be Silent: Preach the Word

Just like it was time for Joe Paterno and the Penn State officials who heard about what was going on with Jerry Sandusky, as it was time for them to speak and to deal with the matter that was happening as he was a representative of their institution. Silence can hurt. A preacher was asked, an older preacher by the name of Bob Crawley. He was asked, he’s now passed on. What do you think is going to be the next big issue that affects the Lord’s people? And his response to that was whatever we’re not preaching on now. And I find that to be an interesting response. And as I think about the danger of silence, that sometimes it is not so golden. I think of an application of this in regard to preaching God’s message.

We cannot be silent. We need to be extensive in our explanation of what God’s will is for us. And so I want to make a point tonight about preaching the word. The well known statements of Paul to Timothy, I think, need to be recited here. Look at 2 Timothy chapter 3. This will be another occasion where the chapter division might throw you off. But it’s good to just keep reading through this context. Timothy has learned the scriptures from his youth. And he’s been trained in them by, as we found out earlier in 2 Timothy, by his grandmother Lois and his mother Eunice. The sacred writings that are able to make one wise unto salvation. And he says he needs to continue in those things that he’s become convinced of.

And he’s told that all scripture is inspired of God and profitable for teaching and correction for instruction and righteousness, that the man of God may be adequate or complete. And so he says, Timothy, you can be adequate or complete if you pay attention to this message. And he says, equipped for every good work, and then he solemnly charges him in the presence of Christ, preach that message. Preach the word and be ready in season and out of season. Reprove, rebuke, exhort. It’s sort of like this. Penn state situation. You know, to do what you should do might have meant a little bit of upset, might have been involved a little inquiry into what’s going on with this Jerry Sandusky character, and perhaps some of his behavior might have been revealed, and Penn State would have been in some hot water.

But not to the extent that they’re in now. They were obligated to speak regardless of the consequences. And that’s what Paul is telling Timothy about preaching the word. You have to speak regardless of how it is received. In season or out of season, he says, reprove, rebuke. And some of the things you’re going to have to say, people are not going to embrace fully. Everybody that listens to you is not going to be on board. And remember what we saw in Isaiah when he is commissioned. Hear my send me, he said. And how long? Until the land is desolate. Well, that’s a little ominous. Everybody’s not going to respond favorably to your message, Isaiah. And so Timothy is told the same, because time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but they’re going to want teachers that tell them what they want to hear.

They want their ears tickled. They want things that are pleasing and soothing to their own desires. He says in verse 3. And when that happens, they turn aside from the truth. And that’s why you need to speak it, Timothy, because they will turn aside unto that which isn’t truth. Myth. And so he says in verse 5, be sober in all things. What’s that mean? Timothy, now, while you’re preaching, don’t drink. That’s not what he’s saying. He’s saying, be sober in all he’s saying, be watchful, be on the lookout for the needs of the people. Be sober in all things. Endure hardship. Do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry. Do you have any idea? Well, you don’t. Some of you might. Do you have any idea what it is like to derive your living from those who could say, I don’t agree with you.

Bye. I’ve thought about that a few times through the year, especially in some difficult circumstances where you’re preaching a message that’s not really liked very much. And you derive your living from the gospel, and they can just say, well, good luck.

4. Subjects With Which People Will Struggle

And some of you who have had some uncertainty in regard to occupation know what it’s like to get the send you bye-bye slip. And so Timothy is told, you’ve got to preach the word. Be instant in season and out of season. Or Paul did not shrink to declare the whole council of God. And as you do that, you realize there are some subjects with which people will struggle. And while they may or may not say it out loud, they do not agree with what you say. I preach a lot about sobriety, and this time I am talking about the intoxication with alcohol. I’ll tell you forfeit sobriety, you sin against God. And I know there is a long debate at what extent at what point one forfeits sobriety.

Is it with one drink, one glass of wine, one beer, whatever the case might be? But I’ll tell you, when you’ve had all of those arguments, I’m still going to tell you forfeit sobriety, you’ve sinned against God. And I believe from a biblical point of view that line, and that’ve expressed to you before you take, that’s where a Christian should stand. And when you preach that in the year 2012, even among those who are in Christ, some will not like what you say. They will pigeonhole you and they will say, you’re just preaching tradition. You’re just taking the party line. And I would just say that’s possible. We’re all influenced by tradition to some degree. But I want to affirm to you.

A preacher, my parents, elders, congregations where I grew up. I don’t believe that I hold any position on the basis of my tradition. Because it would be wrong for me to do so. I am to preach the word. And that’s why we had that study with the young people in the classroom upstairs about sobriety, what the Bible has to say about drinking wine, and to understand better what seems to be some confusing messages in the Old Testament. Looks like wine’s a good thing. Wine’s a bad thing. How are we to determine? And so we looked at the words involved. We look at the circumstances. We saw how wine was used in the customs of that day as an ordinary table beverage. That was either non-intoxicating because it had been boiled, or it had just a very little smidgen, perhaps, that you could not even detect in terms of alcoholic content, and how that is a far cry in that culture from going to the store and buying that which we know is 6 to 14% alcoholic content.

It’s not the same thing. We’re comparing apples to oranges, and I’ve talked to you about that before. And so we’ll go through all of that and talk about. Bottom line is you forfeit sobriety, you sin against God.

And we need to preach that and warn people about the dangers of consuming a strong drink, which is routinely condemned in the Old Testament. And what we’re buying at the store, if you buy it, is a strong drink that will control you and will cause you to forfeit sobriety. Secondly, another not so popular subject is modesty. To adorn oneself immodestly is simple. We are to adorn ourselves as one as befits one making a claim to godliness, 1 Timothy chapter 2, verses 9 and 10. And I’ll just tell you, that’s going to, that’s been controversial. It’s going to be controversial because there will be some among us who will stretch it right to the limit. That’s the way it always has been. That’s the way it will be.

And people are at different levels of spiritual maturity and perhaps not trained as well. You know, in Hebrews chapter 5, it talks about having our senses trained to discern between good and evil, that solid food is for the mature. And so it just stands the reason you’re going to have some who are immature, who make immature decisions, whose senses are not trained, they don’t see the danger in all of this. As he was talking to them at this time, they ought to be teachers, but he has to go back to the milk of the word with them because of their immaturity. We’re going to have all different levels of spiritual growth among us, and yes, some are going to get right up next to the line.

And we’re going to say, that’s not wise. We can’t sit as judge and jury on every decision people make in this area. I think there’s certainly some blatant disregard for modesty that we can. But this isn’t going to be a popular subject that’s addressed. How about the subject of the submissive role the wife is called upon to play in the home? We don’t talk about that a whole lot. I think women among our fellowship are far more submissive than you normally see out there in the world. Do I tell you this message? When I start talking about the submissiveness that God commends for women in the home, it’s disdained by our world. Ephesians chapter 5 and verse 24. It’s regarded as weak. It’s regarded as giving men authority that they can abuse.

No, this does not encourage the abuse of authority. The abuse of authority is sinful, too. A husband not dealing with his wife, as we said this morning in an understanding way, causes one’s prayers to be hindered. The husband who does not love his wife as Christ loved the church. No, it doesn’t encourage that. But Jesus was submissive, and that’s the role of authority or submission to authority that God has called the woman to play in marriage. And then there will be those who neglect our assemblies. What about the interference of work? What about unforeseen and unavoidable circumstances? What about most missing services while traveling or on vacation? These are all questions that we have to deal with. When is the I don’t feel well excuse legitimate?

Sometimes, well, I don’t feel well. If I was going to use that excuse, I might not have been here tonight. I’m giving a sick day every year, aren’t I? If I need it? Mike said no. What if I said I didn’t really feel well tonight? I don’t think I’m coming. So, well, hey, if you don’t feel well, that’s the golden ticket. You can excuse yourself. But my question about that is, what if you felt the same, would you still go to the AM football game? I wouldn’t. You might. Would you still go to work? Would you still go to that fun thing you’ve been planning for three months that you bought the tickets for way back when? Isn’t it amazing? How we can feel exactly the same, but we can find a little bit of energy and enthusiasm for some other things that we may not be able to find for worship to the Lord.

So I gotta work. I’ve got to work. Are you glad you have to work? Are you excited about that? Well, I guess I get a pass. What’s your attitude? That’s the issue there. And again, people are not going to draw the lines in the same place. You know, we don’t generally withdraw from people who miss two out of three services. But that’s the pattern and habit of some. Should they be withdrawn from? I’ll tell you, the real issue is not whether we withdraw from, the real issue is what’s the Lord think about your decisions. And so I’m going to preach, I’ll tell you what I’m going to preach about that. I’m going to tell people, like I said this morning, we’re a body, and the Lord has expectations of us because we’re a body.

And when people are missing assemblies, assembly after assembly, they’re saying it’s all about me and not about us. And so we need to, again, we’re having people all over the maturity scale as we deal with that. When you talk about this, preacher’s hitting a little close to home with some of this. And we’ve got to be careful when this perhaps fits somebody in my family. But I don’t automatically run to the defense of my family member that I love. Because they’re in violation. Sometimes it’s not their own personal violation, it’s the violation of a family member that then changes their view about all of this. I’ve talked to you before about people who’ve changed their views on marriage, divorce, and remarriage because of what a child has done, or a parent has done.

We must not exalt any relationship of family above what is right and above spiritual family. These are my mothers and brothers. His own family was saying he’s lost his mind. In Mark chapter 3. Your family’s come to speak with you or to take custody of you, Mark says in Mark chapter 3, and they’re outside waiting to talk with you, and he says, here’s my family. Everyone who hears the word of God and does it. His family had some things to learn about who he was and what he was accomplishing. And so we need to be careful not to exalt family. In any of these areas as well. Above what is right. And sometimes that’s a challenge for us. Because these are people that we hold very dear.

5. I Must Be Careful to Only Preach God's Instruction

Now, let me say this. I must be careful to only preach God’s instruction. Well, you know, everything you said tonight, Tony, has not been a quotation of the scripture. Some people think it’s not a sermon unless everything that is said is an actual quotation of scripture. What must be said must be consistent with what the scriptures teach. There’s an interesting passage in Nehemiah that you might want to look at in Nehemiah chapter 8 and verse 8, when the people stood up for three hours as the law was spoken. And then it says something interesting in Nehemiah chapter 8 and verse 8, where the sense was given to what was read. I get from that what he’s saying is that the word was delivered, the word was preached, and then there was, okay, now this is what this means.

This is what we’re supposed to do with the instruction, as we talked a little bit about this morning, the discipline of the how in accomplishing. It’s not my business to say.

Let me tell you about the hymn on your skirts, ladies. It has to be no shorter than approximately one half inch above your knee or one half inch below your knee. At that point, you have sinned and transgressed the law of God. That’s not my position. My position that I’m to preach is that immodesty is sinful. And that God encourages you to dress as an individual in such a way that reflects I’m a Christian. I don’t get to make all the rules about every garment. It’s him like. I’ll tell you, there’s some garments that actually, in terms of length might get the job done, but in terms of tightness is unacceptable. It just depends. I can’t make a hard and fast rule about the garments. That’s like missing assemblies.

People miss for a variety of reasons. Sometimes we say they’re providentially hindered. And perhaps they are if they’re sick. They can’t get here. If they said as I, like I said this morning, if they have some kind of contagious disease, we don’t want to come. We don’t want to infect everybody with the illness. But we need to teach about the importance of assembly and the importance of being a body. And we’re not going to come to the conclusions, the same conclusions about every kind of behavior. Which movies should a Christian watch or not watch? Which television shows are not acceptable fodder for the mind seeking pure and virtuous and righteous thought. Do you think everybody makes the same decision about all those things? We’ve got to allow some room for growth.

6. Use This Tongue Gloriously

The New Testament talks about growing into maturity in many places, Ephesians chapter 4, 2 Peter chapter 3. We’ve got to allow some room for growth. But as I say that, let me say, you better draw your lines carefully. You better draw your lines safely. So, well, he doesn’t, he can’t watch the show, or he can’t see this. That’s his standard. Well, my standard’s good. Not necessarily. Again, it’s what the Lord thinks that matters. Let’s talk about our words as we conclude. Your tongue. This mighty little member of our bodies. It’s really amazing. I’ve said this before. That it’s really not that pretty of a part of our body. Maybe that’s why God enclosed it in our mouths. But that little piece of flesh inside our mouths helps us to communicate thoughts.

You know, your beloved animal, they communicate to you. You’ve learned their behavior. When they growl, you sort of get it, don’t you? Or when they bark or meow, you know by the tone of the meow. What that means. They communicate to us. But isn’t it amazing that we don’t bark and meow? That we can we can moan and groan, I guess, but much better to say what we to form a word. To have thought and then immediately be able to express that in a language and somebody else hear that with their ears and know exactly. And let’s work on that so that what we say, somebody can exactly know what we mean. Communication. It’s marvelous. It is a testimony to the fact that we are created by a marvelous creator.

Just your speech. It’s phenomenal. And should we not use this tongue gloriously, and that’s the point that’s being made in these passages. When we speak, may our words be exalted by using it in these ways. And confessing Him in teaching His will. Hey, teachers of our Bible classes, I know that’s a tough work. You volunteer for that, you’re stuck in there for a quarter. Sometimes that’s a challenging situation. A lot of preparation is involved. But do you realize what you’re doing so marvelously with this instrument God gave you? It’s a marvelous thing. It’s a high and exalted thing. And when we worship God in psalm, we sing these songs to the throne of God. Isn’t that what God envisioned when he gave us? This ability. And we’re going to have to work on this.

Conclusion

So that when the words that we speak are kind. As we said this morning, yes, even in our homes. Even people that we hardly know and don’t know at all. Words of kindness and words of compassion for people who experience pain. Words that indicate that we empathize with their condition. What a marvelous way we can use this great instrument that God has given us. And you have used another part of your human body that God endowed you with in a marvelous way tonight as you’ve used your ears to listen to his message. And if there’s someone in this audience tonight who’s not yet confessed Christ, with a mouth, confession is made unto salvation. It’s interesting. In Proverbs 18 and verse 21, life and death are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.

Such tremendous potential for good and for evil. What exalted words could come out of your mouth to say, I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God. And when we go out there tomorrow, remember, let your speech always be seasoned with salt, that it may give grace to those who hear. Do people regard your speech as that which gives grace to a situation? As apples of gold in settings of silver, so is a word spoken in right circumstances. Proverbs 25 and verse 11. Do you need to make the confession of Christ and to become a Christian tonight? We encourage you to respond while we stand and sing together.