Fellowship

Introduction

Good morning. You up for a challenge this morning? Got your thinking caps on? I say that because some of what for some of you what I’m about to say is going to challenge beliefs you may have had your whole life on this subject. Because it’s just been the last couple of years through my own study that I have changed what I believe on this subject. So which only goes to prove the point that we hear Tony mention quite often, which is no matter how long we’ve been Christians, we can never stop studying and learning. We always have to be examining God’s word and ensuring that we’re practicing all of it and we’re practicing all of it scripturally. So I just ask that you keep an open mind.

Study these scriptures together with me this morning and see if you come up with the same conclusions. We’re going to talk about fellowship. We’re going to talk about both the extending of fellowship and the withdrawing of fellowship. And where does that term withdrawing fellowship come from? As and is it even a scriptural term? So I have your attention. Let’s start off with a definition. So according to three different Greek lexicons define fellowship as follows.

1. Fellowship Involves a Close Mutual Relationship

To be in fellowship with someone involves a close mutual relationship. So let’s look at some examples. Our word fellowship appears 14 times in the New Testament. I’m going to show you four examples. So in Galatians, the second chapter, James, Cephas, and John extended the right hand of fellowship to Barnabas and Paul. So in their culture, to clasp the right hand of a person was to make a solemn vow of friendship and an offer of fellowship. If we were to say they shook hands with Barnabas and me as a sign we were all partners, that is literally they extended them the right hand of fellowship. The whole action means entering into a covenant, into a binding agreement between two parties, a pledge that they will both abide by what has been agreed upon.

And as the definitions showed, this demonstrates the idea of a partnership. So some translations have restructured that sentence to make it a little bit more clear. The New English Bible translates it, they accepted Barnabas and Paul as partners and shook hands upon it. The Jerusalem Bible as they shook hands with Barnabas and me as a sign of partnership.

No association, no partnership. Do not be mutually joined with unfruitful fruitful works of works of darkness. On the other hand, in Philippians, he commended the Philippines for their fellowship in the gospel from the first day until now. So he was commending them for sharing with him in the preaching of the gospel. And then the Apostle John reminds us that if we walk in the light as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin. So we’re in close association with God, in partnership with God, because we walk in the light as he is in the light. So then we should be able to rightly conclude that it is impossible to be in fellowship with someone against their will.

Can we not? One person may desire fellowship with another, but they cannot have it without mutual consent. That’s essentially what he says in verse 6 of 1 John 1. He says, if we say we are in fellowship with Him, speaking of God and walking darkness, we lie and we do not practice the truth. So if we no longer if we no longer walk in the light, we no longer have a close association with God. So it is impossible for us to be in fellowship with him. So let me repeat.

2. Should We Welcome Anyone Who Wants to Identify with Us?

Anyone who wants to identify with us. If the answer to that question is yes, then we open ourselves up to factious brethren, to troublemakers, to hotheads. Surely you say no one like that is a member of the Lord’s church. Well, there may be a few. We also subject ourselves to welcoming people into our fellowship who may not be in fellowship with God. So you say, wait a minute, what right do we have to not welcome someone who says they want to be in fellowship with us? They want to place membership with us. So years ago, when I was an elder at another church, a woman came to the front and said she wanted to place membership with us. And so my announcement to the congregation was once the elders meet with her, we will either make that official or not.

So I had a sister that came to me afterwards and read me the right act. What right did I have to deny fellowship to someone who was seeking to join with us? So let’s see if there’s any examples we can find in the Bible of that happening. You may think of the example of Paul. So in Acts, the ninth chapter, shortly after his conversion, Paul sought to join himself to the Jerusalem church. And as a side note, this is the same scripture that we use when we look for authority on the fact that you need to join yourself to a local congregation after you’ve been baptized. There’s no such thing, in my understanding, as a member at large in the Lord’s church. You need to join yourself to a local congregation.

So that’s what Paul sought to do. And the brethren at Jerusalem refused to accept him because of his previous reputation, you know, as someone who was tormenting Christians and putting them in jail. So it wasn’t until Barnabas in verse 27 testified to Paul’s character that they accepted Paul. It says in verse 28, after receiving Barnabas’ report that Paul was with them at Jerusalem, coming in and going out. So he was in fellowship with them at that point. So if a congregation could refuse to extend fellowship to Paul, who among us would be exempt from having our character checked out before being welcomed into fellowship in a congregation. Also, John told Gaius of a brother named Diatrophes in 3rd John. Diatrophes was a malicious gossip who not only wanted to run the church, but he wanted to throw, and he was throwing brethren out of the church.

So what if Diotrephes moved to Tomball and he wanted to place membership at the Decapary Church? Should we just welcome him in because he wants to place membership without checking out who he was? I’m sure he would provide a very convincing story of his love for the church and his stand for the truth. but any congregation that would accept him would be asking for trouble. Now he’s been dead about 2,000 years, but I think I’ve met some of his descendants. Luckily they’re few and far between, and maybe you’ve known some too. I’m talking about brethren whose aim it seems to be to stir up trouble and be divisive. and Titus also tells us about the existence of such people in the third chapter. He says, Reject a divisive man after the first and second admonition, knowing that such a person is warped and sinning, being self-condemned.

So we do we don’t need to invite trouble. So when someone seeks to become a member at Decker Prairie, which happens quite a lot recently, elders sit down and meet with them and quote unquote interview them. So we’re trying to find out to the best of our ability what their standing with God is. Now, in the majority of situations, the people that have come here we’ve already known about, or people here know about them and have testified to their character. But basically we’re taking their word for it. But there’s been a couple of occasions since I’ve been here where we have sat in front of a person or a couple who were either in an unscriptural marriage that we found out about after asking questions, or had gotten unscripturally divorced.

3. Is Withdrawing Fellowship a Scriptural Term?

So should we be accepting those people into our fellowship? People that do not have in those situations, do not have fellowship with God. I say we should, we can’t do that. We mustn’t do that. So let’s look at some of the passages that we usually refer to when we’re talking about withdrawing fellowship. So 2 Thessalonians, the third chapter, verse 6. But we command you, brethren, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you withdraw from, it says in the New King James, withdraw yourselves from, it says in the King James, or keep away from, it says in the NIV, the ESV, and the New American Standard. Every brother who walks disorderly and not according to the tradition which you received from us. And then down in verse 14, and if anyone does not obey our word in this apostle epistle, note that person and do not keep company with him, that he may be ashamed.

So those phrases are a little bit different, but all basically have the same general connotation. We’re to sever our previous relationship. And then the other primary verse we talk about is 1 Corinthians, the fifth chapter. It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and such sexual immorality as is not even named among the Gentiles, that a man has his father’s wife, and you are puffed up and have not, rather mourned that he has done this deed, that he who has done this deed might be taken away from among you. So we’re going to look at a couple of other phrases that are relevant to this whole idea of withdrawing fellowship. And then down in verse 5, deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.

And in verse 11, but now I have written you not to associate, it says in the New American Standard, the NIV, the ESV, not to keep company in the New King James, and not to eat in the King James with anyone named a brother who is sexually immoral or covetous or idolater or a reveler or a drunkard or an extortion or not even to eat with such a person. So this term, withdrawing fellowship, is not found in the Bible. So does that mean that it’s unscriptural? I’ve read an article by a faithful gospel preacher that says that is what it means. Because we can’t find it in the Bible, it’s an unscriptural term. So we’re going to look at that and see if that’s really the case.

There are other terms we use to describe what we do as a church that we don’t find in the Bible. We talk about our singing being a cappella singing. That’s not in the Bible. We talk about songbooks, about Bible classes. You could go on and on. There’s a lot of phrases we use that are correct phrases to describe what we do that aren’t in the Bible. So should we be using this phrase or should we not? If a brother or sister indicates that they no longer wish to be in fellowship with us or that they will be attending elsewhere, why would we send them a letter withdrawing fellowship from them? You cannot remove something that does not exist.

And so it goes along with what we said earlier. It’s not a mutual relationship, so there’s no fellowship to withdraw from. I’ve been part of elderships in the past that have done just that. We’ve done that here at Decker Prairie, and I’ve done it. We’ve sent a letter to somebody who quit simply stopped attending, withdrawing fellowship. I don’t believe any longer that was the right thing to do. Remember, fellowship expresses a two-sided relationship. Consider it another way. When a Christian express chooses to walk in darkness, they no longer have fellowship with God, as we read in 1 John, the first chapter. When a man commits adultery, for example, his relationship with God is severed. God has taken no action regarding his partnership with this person. The man has done it himself.

So why would we as this church act any differently than God does? So what does the text say? Second Thessalonians the third chapter. It says to withdraw ourselves. It also says, as we just recently looked at, to keep away from, not to keep company with. So what are we to withdraw? We’re to withdraw ourselves from ungodly brethren. So while the term withdrawing fellowship is not found in the Bible, isn’t that what we’re doing when we withdraw ourselves? We’re severing the relationship. We’re saying there’s no more joint participation. We’re no longer in close association. So we are ending fellowship with that person. Consider the fornicator in 1 Corinthians, the fifth chapter. As we read, he’s this was a man living in sin by cohabitating with his stepmother, and the church wasn’t doing anything against it or about it.

4. Deliver Such a One to Satan

So Paul says to deliver such a one to Satan. So what does that mean? One Greek scholar says that’s not to be taken literally, that when Paul meets what Paul means is that the person concerned should be put out of the church and forced to live in the world, which is ruled by Satan. This way he’ll learn to fear God and escape the greater punishment that is to come. Another Greek scholar says basically the same thing. This man must be delivered to Satan. He doesn’t he means not to be handed over literally to the power of the evil one, rather to that all the ills of life, the sorrow, the suffering, everything that’s associated with Satan, he would be subject to. So from a practical standpoint, how do we do that?

I the only way I know of is we make an announcement to the congregation, and we have to tell you that this person is in error, they are no longer that they’re under the influence of Satan, that they’re no longer walking according to the light, and that they’re living in sin and they show no signs of repentance. I mean, we obviously can’t physically, unless we open the front door and toss them out on his ear, we can’t physically throw them into the world, so there has to be another way. What we have to do is let the let everyone know that he is under Satan’s influence. I believe that’s what’s being referred to by that term. And the reason we’re to withdraw from people is that a little leaven leavens the whole lump, as we talked about in Bible class this morning.

So it’s you know, it’s impossible to avoid contact with all immoral people, even says that in verses 9 and 10 of 1 Corinthians, the fifth chapter. We live in the world. However, we’re not to even have a common meal with a brother who is an extortioner, a covetous person, you know, the list, which was not by all means not inclusive of the things that we are to avoid if our brethren are involved in. So, of course, one purpose of that is to for to avoid giving the appro appearance of the church approving of that behavior. And it also brings to mind Paul’s admonition in 1 Corinthians 15 33 that evil companionship corrupts good habits. So let’s look further at conditions. Are there any conditions with regarding withdrawal?

5. Withdraw from Those Among You

And so there’s the one about not having meals with. We’ll talk about that a little bit more. So, what of what about this phrase among you? How does that relate to this? So, in first, in the fifth chapter again of 1 Corinthians, he says that there was sexual immorality among you, and that the fornicator must be taken away from among you. In 2 Thessalonians, he says that he was not disorderly among you, but that he had heard that there are some who walk among you in a disorderly manner. And Peter told the elders in 1 Peter the fifth chapter to shepherd the church of God that is among you. So I’m sure all of us would agree, hopefully, that the elders can only have oversight of those that are among them.

We have no authority to shepherd a flock that worships somewhere else. I’m sure we would all agree to that. So, why would we also not agree that the Bible does not teach that we’re to withdraw fellowship from those who are not among them? How’s that for a triple negative? In other words, isn’t it the same principle? If the elders are supposed to shepherd the flock among you, how can we withdraw from someone who is not among us? Instead, we’re commanded to withdraw ourselves or withdraw fellowship from disorderly brethren who are among us who are still in our midst. There’s no passage that I know of that suggests we withdraw from someone not in our midst. And then again, there the example of diotrophies and in John the third chapter also brings into another point into play here.

There’s no record of any congregation in the New Testament contacting another congregation about their internal affairs. And yet today that happens quite often. I’ve had other elders tell me that they get letters, they have gotten letters from another church who finds out that a withdrawn from brother is worshiping with them, telling them about the status of that person. That’s not their business.

Every congregation is independent and autonomous, as we know the Bible teaches, and one congregation is not bound by in any way by the actions of another. It’s no other congregation’s business what we do at Decker Prairie. What would really be helpful in this whole situation is if we restored a practice that used to be in place years ago. When Jackie and I were first Christians and we moved from one church to another, the elders at the church we left gave us a letter to take to the church we went to say we were members in good standing. So as an elder, I can tell you that would be extremely helpful to have a letter like that. So there’s no, so we’re not taking the chance of what of welcoming a dioctrophies.

6. When Christians Sin and Refuse to Repent

So then, what do we do when Christians sin? and refuse to repent, but they’re still worshiping with us, they’re still among us. We’ve had that situation here not that long ago. But so by a by a apostolic command, we have to withdraw from them, no longer associate with them or even sit down and have a common meal with them. We don’t have to wait 30 days and write them a letter. when such a person is among us, we have to deliver him to Satan, meaning we tell everyone that this person is living in sin, they refuse to repent, and you’re not to associate with them. Now that doesn’t mean that we shun them, that we ignore them, that we’re in any way nasty to them.

We still care about them. That means we tell them we care about them, we’re praying for them that they will change, that they will repent, and that they will come back to the Lord. Our goal and the whole goal of withdrawing someone is to get people to come back to the Lord. So what if they have repented? What if they if they have, then we’re not under that admonition, are we? I mean, if they’ve repented and they’re still among us, then we can eat with them, we can associate with them. So the key is repentance. And how do we know if they’ve truly repented? In a lot of cases, that’s very difficult to know. Luke 3, verse 8 says we can know you show repentance by your fruits.

So typically, someone can show by their actions or needs to show by their actions that they have changed their behavior. that they’ve that they’ve put those sinful habits behind them. So let’s take adultery, for example. Someone’s committed adultery. Have they totally ended that relationship? That would be part of repentance. Are they truly full of godly sorrow? Do they rue the day they ever committed that sin? Or are they still blaming other people? Saying you repent is not repenting. You have to show it by your actions. So let’s say someone comes forward and admits to a struggle with alcohol, and they’re repenting and they want our prayers and they want our help. How do we treat them? and some in a case like that, repentance may not be immediate, it may be a process.

But we can still determine, even if it is a process, if they’re making progress, right? And we’re gonna have to get to know them and what they’re doing if that’s gonna be the case. But I’ve talked to members at other congregations who have done just that. They’ve gone to the front, talk talked about a problem with alcohol and asked for prayers, and we’re shunned by some of the members from that point on. That’s we can’t treat people that way. we have to try to help people and pray for people, and that’s incumbent upon all of us. So what some people ask, so what about family members that are involved in sin and refuse to repent? The family relationship is not severed because one sins.

Parents have moral and legal obligations to their children, even to those who might be living in sin. Spouse has moral and legal obligations to their spouse, even though they might be living in sin. How are you going to not eat with a spouse that’s living in the same house, even if they’re living in sin? That’s not practical, that’s not practical. But we can still encourage them to repent and change their life. So remember, the goal is the goal is again to have them come to repentance. It worked at Corinth. Because they because the brethren there cease to associate with that man in the second chapter, it says he came to repentance. So airing Christians who leave a local congregation need to be reproved and exhorted.

Conclusion

However, when they indicate that they no longer want to be in fellowship with that congregation, then there’s nothing the brethren can scripturally do. We can announce that this person has decided to worship elsewhere, but we cannot withdraw fellowship when no fellowship exists. So let me conclude by saying withdrawal is something we do as a last resort, and we’ve said that before.

So excuse me. That will not change. What will change is we will no longer be withdrawing from people who have withdrawn themselves. If there is no fellowship, if there is no close association, no relationship, it doesn’t make sense, and I don’t think it’s biblically correct to withdraw from that person. So to be a brother, to be withdrawn from, in conclusion, a brother or sister has to be in our midst and refuse to repent. So that’s a lesson. If you don’t agree with that, please see Robert Jeff or Tom. Just kidding. Seriously, we’ve all talked about this a lot. We’ve studied this together. We all agree. Tony agrees. But if you don’t, we’re open to discussion, we’re open to study, and as we are about anything.

So thank you for listening. If you’re here today and we can help you with your walk with Christ, either to get started or to get back on track, please come to the front as we stand and sing.